real encouragement for real homeschool moms


our Ben tree

This week I am enjoying the last of fall colors on our street. Rains a few days ago shook the leaves from some of the trees but in our front yard, the two maples are still full and intense, casting a golden glow into the rooms on that side of the house. It is my favorite week of the year with the last bit of summer loveliness quickly fading and the coziness of winter promising to visit us soon. We planted the larger of these trees the year our son Ben was born and it serves as a daily reminder to me of God’s faithfulness to our family.

During the first four years of our marriage, we had three children and were pretty overwhelmed. During my pregnancy with the third, I told my doctor that I wanted to have my tubes tied right after delivery and still remember the look on his face and his response, “Mrs. Campbell!” he admonished. “You are only 25 years old! I would never consider doing such a thing! You may want to have more children in the future. I will not do this.”

Still determined to limit our family to three children, we were content for 7 years…until we attended a Basic Seminar with Bill Gothard. Only two years into his ATI program, he painted a vision for us that was forever to change our lives. Six weeks later we pulled our children out of public school and began homeschooling, six months later I was pregnant with child number four. Now, 28 years, 6 kids, and 14 grandchildren later, I am still grateful for the message we heard that late November night: that children are a blessing and we should consider having more, that homeschooling is good for children and parents, we should try it. God opened our hearts and minds to His will for our family.

We had to learn many lessons in the years that followed. We never fully bought into the Gothard paradigm, though I was the one who often wanted us to try. I was wooed by the navy neck bows and a 5000 member choir of spit-shined young people singing “It will be worth it all when we see Jesus.” Clay, not so much. But our love of little ones and homeschooling never waned and the Lord blessed us in spite of many years when my family threatened to become a form of idolatry in my own life. When the pride of seeking perfection blinded me to real people and their real needs. When I didn’t realize that loving God really meant loving others more than myself.

This has been a difficult week for many moms. Doug Phillips is the man the Lord used to inspire their husbands to consider the value of being a dad. He is the one who painted a picture of motherhood for them that resonated with the God-given desire most women have to nurture and love children. He gave them hope for their families in a world that most Christians realize is increasingly post-modern if not downright pagan. He inspired families to love America and to see God’s sovereignty in many places we had forgotten it existed. And those messages are true and good ones.

But somehow hearing criticism of the man and his philosophies has translated to these wonderful moms that their choices have not been valid ones. And this is the real sadness of it all. Because God HAS used Vision Forum for good in many ways IN SPITE OF the bad theology, IN SPITE OF the dangerous teachings, IN SPITE OF the damage done to so many. But rather than minimize or ignore the false teachings and pretend it is genuine Biblical truth, now is the time to say, “God is good, He has led our family, not because of what Doug Phillips said but because God showed us these things by His grace alone!”

Now is also the time for families who have been caught up in the patriarchy paradigm to ask hard questions. It is time to put away the big red manuals, the endless CD’s of “encouragement,” the books and programs and conference paraphernalia and pick up the Bible. It is time for parents to humble themselves and seek forgiveness from their children, some of them long-estranged because the paradigm taught that they should be. It is time to repent of the pride of who has a larger family, who is interning where, who is courting whom, who has the most modest clothes, who God is blessing, who He is cursing, etc. Have you been blessed? Rejoice and be grateful! Are you struggling? Rejoice and be grateful! Reject the idolatry of the paradigm, embrace the relationships around you. Pull out one of the one anothering verses every single day, over and over again, and live them! Love God, love your children, love your neighbors. Welcome God’s grace and be thankful for how God alone, not Doug Phillips, Bill Gothard, a patriarchal leader, radio teacher, or any man, has brought you to this point!

Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs.” ~ Jonah 2:8


32 Responses to Thinking thoughtfully about Doug Phillips’ resignation, part five ~ praise where praise is due

  • Heather says:

    One of the most thoughtful responses I’ve read. Thank you for putting many of my thoughts in experience.

  • Homeoccupied says:

    Thank you so much, Karen, for this post! Thank you for the reminder that many of us get lured by outward appearances and Biblical sounding, but untrue ideas, but that “all things work together for good for those who are called according to His purpose.” Thank you Jesus, for Your grace!

  • Shepherdess says:

    Thank you, Karen, for all your thoughtful writing this week! I am one of those moms who has been spinning in circles this week since hearing the D.P. news. I recognize that this is because he was an idol to me. I am sure I could have walked away from everything good in my life, I was so angry! But God has restrained me by His faithful and loving hand. Thanks be to God that He has been merciful to me and many others during this time of trial.

  • Anna says:

    Excellent post! This how I feel about the years my family spent in ATI. Yes, there were some legalistic hang-ups to overcome, and no, I would not want to homeschool my children in the program, but God did use it for good in our lives.

  • Liv says:

    Kudos for sharing such important insights! When I read this part, tears came into my eyes:

    Quote: “But rather than minimize or ignore the false teachings and pretend it is genuine Biblical truth, now is the time to say, “God is good, He has led our family, not because of what Doug Phillips said but because God showed us these things by His grace alone!” ”

    In the early days the home school movement was birthed seemingly from out-of-nowhere with people feeling led to do it all over the country around the same time. We just felt a strong prompting to educate our children at home even though we knew of no one else doing this, nor had we ever heard the term “home schooling” before. No mere “man or woman” truly initiated the movement. I believe it started with people being led by the Holy Spirit through God’s Word, so to me it is very meaningful that this writer pulls it all back to where it began – God’s grace.

    I think home schooling started out as a very good thing (and continues to be), but a few men with really huge ego and control issues jumped in and turned it into a money-making opportunity. They advertised their ideas and everyone assumed that these men had good hearts following the Lord. That was the first mistake in my mind. We must always have our headlights focused with high beam on Christ and Christ alone.

    We live and learn; thank God for His mercy and compassion.

  • Anthea says:

    There are VF materials being sold here in the UK by little home education supply businesses. The Two Dougs have been taking their act on the road here in England (and other bits of the UK, I think.) So this is a big big story, y’know. There will be many confused people. Some will deny that it matters, perhaps …

    This story is a big surprise to me. I knew nothing about it until today. I popped in to the blog tonight after a long time not reading Thatmom. I do have a note from my mother, however: ‘Please excuse Anthea for her absence from Thatmom this past month. She has actually been home educating her children. She has also been OUTSIDE, to catch the sun before it disappears for eight months.’

  • Anthea says:

    BTW, Karen, I am truly sorry that you have had nasty emails. You do not deserve that. Thank you for all the hard work that you do in your writing and broadcasting. When it comes to Titus2 women, you are the real deal.

  • Susan says:

    Absolutely, without a doubt, unequivocally, the most grace-filled, God honoring response to the Doug Phillips issue that I have read anywhere. “God is good, He has led our family, not because of what Doug Phillips said but because God showed us these things by His grace alone!”

  • becky says:

    “God HAS used Vision Forum for good in many ways IN SPITE OF the bad theology, IN SPITE OF the dangerous teachings, IN SPITE OF the damage done to so many.”

    Very true. Around the year 2000 I did a couple sessions of Weigh Down Workshop, run by Gwen Shamblin. I truly benefited from that program and Gwen’s books and grew closer to the Lord through that program. In the next year or so it became public that Gwen had some rather unorthodox beliefs and most churches (thankfully) dropped her like a hot potato. I don’t recall any bad theology being in her materials but it was probably there in various ways (I threw it all in the garbage when I learned that she denied the deity of Christ)…I think I just assumed she was OK and so I wasn’t looking for problems. I took the good stuff she had to say and added it to what I already knew was true about my relationship with Christ.

    I think a lot of people have the same story when it comes to Vision Forum, No Greater Joy, Above Rubies, etc. They are somehow able to just skim off the good and never really go deep enough to notice the darker side of the teachings. I think that’s a good thing? But it’s discouraging to hear these leaders defended by people who really don’t know the full extent of the patrio teachings and the harm it’s done. I think it helps to acknowledge that yes, there is SOME good in these teachings, like you have done here.

  • TulipGirl says:

    Karen, did you see that the Vision Forum MINISTRIES is being closed by the Board of Directors? Thoughts?

    “In light of the serious sins which have resulted in Doug Phillips’s resignation from Vision Forum Ministries, the Board of Directors has determined that it is in the best interests of all involved to discontinue operations. We have stopped receiving donations, and are working through the logistical matters associated with the closing of the ministry. While we believe as strongly as ever in the message of the ministry to the Christian family, we are grieved to find it necessary to make this decision. We believe this to be the best option for the healing of all involved and the only course of action under the circumstances.”

  • TulipGirl says:

    And, while I really am never surprised when leaders sin grievously. . . I am so, so sad about Doug Philips and how it is impacting his immediate and extended family.

    Sin hurts so much. Not just ourselves, but so many around us. Far-reaching.

    My displeasure with Vision Forum has, for years, been because it has elevated a lifestyle over the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I hate to see this happen to Doug, his family, and many families influenced by VF. And yet. . . if it truly brings him to repentance and a reawakening to the amazing, beautiful, GRACIOUS, gift of grace and the Gospel? Well. . . I can hope and pray it does and that it will have even more far-reaching impact than the lifestyle empire that was built by Vision Forum.

  • Peter Mayo says:

    Hi. I’m quite new to what Vision Forum is all about. In fact, the little I was exposed to, like the Amazon dvd series, and the History of Christianity dvd series, I learned a lot from.
    Can someone please explain to me the dangerous teaching, and bad theology you are talking about? I also have good friends who are big supporters of Doug Phillips as well.


  • hrm? says:

    Yes, I’m in Peter Mayo’s shoes. For only a couple months now, we’ve been listening to the Jonathan Parks radio drama cds. I’d never heard of Vision Forum before this, and really, haven’t had much exposure to this patriarchal theology. I’ve grown up in an evangelical Canadian church and did hear about Bill Gothard many years ago, but what he taught was so far afield from what my family believed that we hardly gave it any further thought. I’ve not sensed this patriarchal stuff in the Jonathan Park cds….perhaps I’ll listen a little more closely now….

  • thatmom says:

    Hi Peter,

    Years ago when I saw this movement taking off, I coined the word “patriocentricity” to define the way men are seen as being central to all family life. I would encourage you to listen to the second patriarchy series of podcasts to see how this works itself out in application. This first podcast gives a mini course in Rushdooney’s teachings and how they are central to this movement.

    Keep listening to the rest of the series to see how various teachers recommend this model be used.

  • Kristin says:

    Thank you for your thoughts.
    I grew up in ATI, was encouraged by some (not all) of what Vision Forum had to offer… but God also opened my eyes over the years to see that men and organizations like these have become idols in the hearts of many families. I know many may just see the sin that was committed and not see the goodness of God in toppling idols. He is jealous for His name to be hallowed, and instead of worshiping our worthy God we have worshiped unworthy men. We need to return back to lives of simple love and obedience with the Word of God central.
    I am single, 28, and now living completely outside of the “Daughter at Home” model…and yet experiencing the wonders of God as I have responded to His calling me to Cambodia. I am thankful for the 27 years of abundant ministry I did have at home with my family, but now my family has joyfully sent me to live in a third world country in response to God’s very clear call.
    It was this change in my life that opened my eyes to see the truth of Scripture clearly and to see that all of God’s people are to be obedient to His command and His commission to make disciples. When God first called me to Cambodia, I looked at Scripture through the Vision Forum lens that daughters should only be home until they are married. After truly studying God’s Word, I realized that I had idolized my earthly father above my Heavenly Father, and that it was Him I needed to obey. My dad, consequently, had been praying for years and years for unreached people groups around the world and it was his great joy to send me here.
    I am praying for the young people in America who were discipled by their parents to know the freedom of loving obedience to God’s commands, and for a movement of disciples making disciples in the US and in unreached places of the world beyond. It is much more freeing to obey God than to obey man, and God is so much more glorified!

  • thatmom says:

    Kristin, thank you so much for sharing your wonderful testimony.

    ” I know many may just see the sin that was committed and not see the goodness of God in toppling idols.” This is exactly right!

  • Mandy N says:

    After years of painful healing from a life full of Gothardism and Patriarchy, I finally was able to let all the pain go and fully move on. Deleted FB and stopped following all of the blogs that helped me come out of all of it as I just wanted to enjoy life beyond it and really didn’t want to read about it anymore. But now, coming across this whole D.P. scandal, it has me crying tears of joy. Over ten years ago with my own personal encounter with Doug Phillip and his pride I prayed he would be exposed. Glory to God for all of the twisted theology soon to be unraveled and all of the scales that will fall off. If it takes something as sad and heart heavy as this, so be it, for it is only the beginning of the real truth of God’s word reaching so many homeschool families and for Christ’s freedom to shine through a very dark and damaging tunnel. May this be the beginning of the end for hyper patriarchal homeschooling days.

  • Mandy N says:

    And for those who may think it is unbiblical for me to rejoice in this unfortunate situation. My heart is very burdened for the victims but those who put themselves on pedestals of authority and preach such a false doctrine, unfortunately, usually need to fall very hard in order to be humbled and repent and I fully rejoice in the falling of the FALSE DOCTRINE and damaging theology. I fully rejoice in wrongs being righted and God’s truth being revealed. I wish that none of this had happened. The years of patriarchy so many have suffered. I pray that IBLP will be exposed someday as well. Yes, it is so painful to walk out of it and see your beloved leader fall(and see all of the damage in it’s wake) but it’s necessary and there is a blessed freedom beyond I wish for everyone.

  • Kris says:

    I just checked out VF’s retail website. Looks like they liquidated everything and it closed Dec. 20th. Looks like everything is closing down not just the ministry. The fallout from this continues. I pray the truth comes out fully and there is true healing for everyone involved.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Now available!

on Kindle!

"In today's homeschooling world, you can find all sorts of formulas and prescriptions. If you just follow the correct method, your children will grow up to live godly lives, and they will always make family (including you) their priority. In this book, Karen Campbell gives you the real story. Homeschooling and parenting are not about formulas and prescriptions. They are about relationships. Weaving together Scripture, her own successes and failures, and her observations of the homeschooling world, Karen provides a wealth of wisdom for the homeschooling parent. If you want a formula, this book is not for you. If you want honest wisdom that will aid you in your homeschooling journey, this book is exactly what you are looking for!" – Dr. Jay Wile, PhD, speaker and author of the popular "Exploring Creation with" series of textbooks.
Promote Relationship Homeschooling!

Be sure to visit Relationship Homeschooling on Facebook!

Family Integrated Church podcasts
The Family Integrated Church ~ Are you frustrated in your search for a church home? Are you considering a family integrated church? The podcast series on the FIC movement is just for you! This series includes Pastor Shawn Mathis who explains the "theological basis" for the movement, Pastor Steve Doyle, who was once an FIC pastor and left the movement, and Bible scholar and author, Jon Zens, who looks at the underlying doctrines that permeate many FIC churches. The series concludes with thatmom's encouragement to homeschooling families as they seek to be part of the entire body of Christ. You will also want to read the series of articles on the pros and cons of the FIC and my exhortation to homeschooling families who are looking for a church home!
thatmom’s podcasts on iTunes
thatmom’s thoughts on curriculum

And you can learn about my thoughts on developing your own philosophy of education as well as finding the methods of homeschooling that work best for you and your children by

looking for my presentations on the Home Educating Family media site!
Three Cheers……..
Subscribe to
truth from the Word
"Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart fail; But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Psalm 73: 25-26
more truth from the Word
"Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you." ~ Ephesians 4:32
William Carey says:
"Our greatest fear should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter."
Tim Keller says:
"God’s love and forgiveness can pardon and restore any and every kind of sin or wrongdoing. It doesn’t matter who you are or what you’ve done. It doesn’t matter if you’ve deliberately oppressed or even murdered people, or how much you’ve abused yourself… There is no evil that the Father’s love cannot pardon and cover, there is no sin that is a match for his grace." ~ Tim Keller
Tim Keller also says:
“The Christian gospel is that I am so flawed that Jesus had to die for me, yet I am so loved and valued that Jesus was glad to die for me. This leads to deep humility and deep confidence at the same time. It undermines both swaggering and sniveling. I cannot feel superior to anyone, and yet I have nothing to prove to anyone. I do not think more of myself nor less of myself. Instead, I think of myself less.” ! Tim Keller in The Reason for God.
Oswald Chambers says:
"If we simply preach the effects of redemption in the human life instead of the revealed, divine truth regarding Jesus Himself, the result is not new birth in those who listen. The result is a refined religious lifestyle, and the Spirit of God cannot witness to it because such preaching is in a realm other than His." ~ Oswald Chambers
Phillip E. Johnson says:
“When pressed in interviews to name my heroes, I have spontaneously responded that they are homeschooling mothers! To me, the heroic mothers who nurture the next generation of faithful Christians are among the leaders of the church.” ~ Phillip E. Johnson
John Stonestreet says:
“C.S. Lewis said that for every new book we read, we ought to read three old ones. But I think for every latest, greatest new homeschooling book you read, go find three old homeschooling moms and ask them what happened and what worked.” ~ John Stonestreet
Carolyn Custis James says:
“The power of our theology comes alive when we take the truth personally. Holding God at arm’s length—no matter how much theology we think we know—will never make us great theologians. We have to learn to write our own names into the plot. God will always be the subject of our theological sentences but our sentences are incomplete until we make ourselves the direct objects of his attributes…..Simply knowing a lot of theological ideas, no matter how orthodox and sound they are, will never turn us into great theologians. Theology isn’t really theology for us until we live it. Not until we learn to make explicit connections between what we know about God and the race we are running will we taste the transforming power of our theology. Fixing our eyes on Jesus means reminding ourselves of all that He is to us now. He brings meaning to our routines and energizes us to tackle the difficult tasks at hand. Fixing our eyes on Jesus gives us hope to offer disheartened husbands and hurting friends, and the wisdom we need to raise children who will fix their eyes on Him, too.” ~ from Carolyn Custis James in When Life and Beliefs Collide
Anne Ortlund says:
“So what do we do to encourage them to grow inwardly, to become resourceful and creative, to think, to meditate, to lay the foundation for growing up well? Don’t push, but affirm them! Give them the sense that all is well, that their rate of progress is acceptable to you, that you like them just the way they are…..Guide them but be delighted in them. Let them know that life is to be reached for and drunk of deeply…..Enthusiastic, that’s how you want them to grow up! The word comes from “en Theo,” or “in God.” Support them with words of faith, hope, and love, and in that framework “in God,” they’ll be ready to tackle everything. Fears and cautions are built in at an early age but so is courage! Tomorrow’s world will be different if your child has been released to experiment, to risk, to lead others, to pursue righteousness, to be an affecter for good in society, to go courageously after God.” ~ Anne Ortlund in Children Are Wet Cement
J.C Ryle says:
"Kindness, gentleness, long-suffering, forbearance, patience, sympathy, a willingness to enter into childish troubles, a readiness to take part in childish joys, these are the cords by which a child may be led most easily, these are the clues you must follow if you would find the way to his heart." ~ J. C. Ryle in The Upper Room
Clay Clarkson says:
“Many Christian parents, myself included, tend to speak to children as though they were Pharisees. We can speak harshly and with judgment, implying by our manner that their hearts are hard and resistant. But this attitude is not justified by Scripture. There is no record of Jesus ever speaking to a a child in a harsh tone. When the Gospels record Him speaking to a child, it is always with gentleness. Our children are not our adversaries. Though our children’s hearts are corrupted by sin, they are not hardened sinners who have made conscious choices to reject the Savior. Our children are simply immature and childish. That’s why children need love and compassion, not harshness and guilt.” ~ Clay Clarkson in Heartfelt Discipline
Tim Kimmel says:
“Grace can’t be some abstract concept that you talk about in your home. It has to be a real-time action that ultimately imprints itself in your children’s hearts. To talk about grace, sing about grace, and have our children memorize verses about grace – but not give them specific gifts of grace – is to undermine God’s words of grace in their hearts. Grace means that God not only loves them but that He loves them uniquely and specially. The primary way to give our children grace is to offer it in place of our selfish preferences.” ~ Tim Kimmel in Grace-Based Parenting
Chuck Swindoll says:
"You want to mess up the minds of your children? Here's how - guaranteed! Rear them in a legalistic, tight context of external religion, where performance is more important than reality. Fake your faith. Sneak around and pretend your spirituality. Train your children to do the same. Embrace a long list of do's and don'ts publicly but hypocritically practice them privately...yet never own up to the fact that its hypocrisy. Act one way but live another. And you can count on it - emotional and spiritual damage will occur. "
Kathy Thile says:
"I say this gently, as the parent of grown kids, knowing *insert parenting guru* is also the parent of grown kids: we have wonderful children — he does, I’m sure — and so do I. But without even knowing his children I can know this about them: they are not perfect. They hurt. They make mistakes. They struggle. They are prideful and overly simplistic at times; and crippled by shame and hesitancy at others. Yes — they are beautiful examples of human beings, his children (I assume), and mine (I know.) But they are not perfect. If they were, they would not be human. If it were possible to raise children to perfection, then God would have sent a parenting method, not Jesus. Our marching orders are not to raise our children by a method to be like *insert parenting guru* children. Our marching orders are to be Christians to and with our children." ~ Kathy Thile
Anna Quindlen says:
“The biggest mistake I made is the one that most of us make while doing this. I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of the three of them sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages 6, 4 and 1. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less." ~ Anna Quindlen
Winston Churchill says:
“My education was interrupted only by my schooling." ~ Winston Churchill
John Taylor Gatto says:
"The shocking possibility that dumb people don’t exist in sufficient numbers to warrant the millions of careers devoted to tending them will seem incredible to you. Yet that is my central proposition: the mass dumbness which justifies official schooling first had to be dreamed of; it isn’t real." ~ John Taylor Gatto
Fred Rogers say:
“Play is often talked about as if it were a relief from serious learning. But for children play is serious learning. Play is really the work of childhood.” ~ Fred Rogers
thatmom says
"The truth is that the way a marriage becomes truly heavenly is for each husband and each wife to pursue, really pursue, a relationship with Jesus Christ, to commit to obey the Word of God, to set aside each of their own agendas and paradigms, and then as they walk in the Holy Spirit, as they are sanctified, a little at a time each day, they will grow closer to one another. Godly wisdom will manifest itself in purity, peace, gentleness, mercy, a willingness to submit to one another, the fruits of the spirit, and no role-playing (the true meaning of hypocrisy). (James 3:17)" ~ thatmom
thatmom says:
"We need to approach our children not as character projects, but rather, we must see them with hearts of sympathy, with compassion and understanding, and with ears that listen. You see, homeschooling is not about lesson plans and research papers and standardized tests. Homeschooling is about building a relationship with our children, friendships that will last our entire lives on earth and clear into eternity. Homeschooling is merely the tool whereby we build those relationships." ~ thatmom
thatmom knows:
As a homeschooling mom, I have realized that everything, ultimately, is outside of my own control. I have learned that the unique circumstances that happen in my family have occurred because God’s plan is so much bigger than my own. It is knowing this truth about God and in experiencing that truth with those in my home that has enabled us to face past challenges and that will prepare us for all those difficulties that still lie before us.
thatmom realizes:
If I think about 37 years of marriage, times the number of loads of laundry I have done for 2 parents, 6 children and 1 grandma, I am amazed to know that I have washed, dried, folded, (sometimes ironed) and put away roughly 27,526 loads of laundry. That is over 215,000 socks! Or, in that same amount of time, provided 38,324 meals for a family and sometimes guests. Or that I have overseen nearly 21,500 hours of education of one sort or another during that time. Just thinking of these numbers takes my breath away. ~ thatmom
thatmom says:
"Real books from the library, a tub of art supplies, being read stories rich in vocabulary, a variety of good music, the daily discussion of God’s Word and how it relates to the world around him, and the attention of a loving parent who includes him in all the activities of real life are the secrets to a great learning experience for children." ~ thatmom
thatmom says:
"Being a mom is sort of like being all the people who crowd into a basketball arena all at once. Sometimes we are the players, the ones who are responsible for everything that is going on and our presence is front and center. Sometimes we are the coaches, giving comfort and encouragement, instructing with a clipboard in hand. Other times we are the referees, no striped shirts required but whistles are a must to break up the disputes when the game isn’t played as per the rules. Still other times we are the fans, cheering wildly from the stands, shouting from a distance but not from the floor. And then there are the days when we are the cheerleaders, the ones who scream 'Yeah, you can do it.' " ~ thatmom
thatmom says:
“The beauty of homeschooling is building relationships within our families and inspiring our children to become lifelong learners, gently leading them into the truth of Scripture and trusting that the work we have begun will be brought to completion by a sovereign God who has a plan for building His heavenly kingdom.” ~ thatmom
thatmom says:
"A family that embraces a paradigm becomes lazy and doesn’t study the Word of God for themselves. They take what others state as gospel. They have to check in with the “expert” blogs to see how so and so is doing it. It requires little effort and, truthfully, little leadership on the part of the parents. Dads who think they are turning the hearts of their children to themselves are really turning the hearts of their children to the dad’s gurus!" ~ thatmom
thatmom also says:
“After parenting for 36 years, I have come to realize that all paradigms are basically a list of do’s and don’ts that someone has created. Instead of embracing a list, I have discovered that it is best for me to run all ideas, philosophies, and paradigms through my “one-anothering hopper.” I ask myself if the suggestions or ideas I am hearing will serve to build my relationships or will serve to tear them down; will they reflect the one-anothering commands of Scripture? I ask if they are a picture of Christ and His relationship with me as His needy daughter. If not, I am not interested, no matter how much appeal they might have for any number of reasons.” ~ thatmom
thatmom says this, too:
“The word wisdom is used in Exodus to describe the knowledge that the Lord gave to the skilled artisans so they could make Aaron’s garments for worship. We are told that these workers “were given wisdom and understanding in knowledge and all manner of workmanship.” I have never had to sew any garments for a priest to wear for worship. I have not had to sew any draperies or build any walls or prepare any inner sanctuary as per the Lord’s instructions. But I have been called to give all I can toward the goal of building up children in the faith, preparing children for life outside my home, children whose bodies, we are told, are called the very temple of the Holy Spirit, children whose job it is to worship in spirit and in truth." ~ thatmom
what does thatmom believe?
" What is thy only comfort in life and death? "That I, with body and soul, both in life and death, am not my own, but belong unto my faithful Savior Jesus Christ; who, with His precious blood, has fully satisfied for all my sins, and delivered me from all the power of the devil; and so preserves me that without the will of my heavenly Father, not a hair can fall from my head; yea, that all things must be subservient to my salvation, and therefore, by his Holy Spirit, He also assures me of eternal life, and makes me sincerely willing and ready, henceforth, to live unto him." ~ Heidelberg Catechism
What does it mean to be a Christian?

1.We must acknowledge that we are all sinners. “For we are all become as one that is unclean, and all our righteousnesses are as a polluted garment: and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, take us away. (Isaiah 64:6) and “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Romans 3:23)

2.We are all accountable for our own sins before God. “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.” (2 Corinthians 5:10)

3.There is only one way to be forgiven of these sins and that is through the blood of Jesus Christ. “Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6)

4.If we confess our sin to the Lord and repent of it (not allow it to rule in our lives) we can be forgiven and be in right standing with God. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousenss.” (1 John 1:9)

5.Genuine salvation will result in living lives of good works but none of those works contribute in any way to our standing before God which is based solely and completely on the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross. “But when Christ had offered for all time a single sacrifice for sins, He sat down at the right hand of God. (Hebrews 10:12) and “Not by works of righteousness which we have done but according to His mercy He saved us by the washing of regeneration and the renewing of the Holy Spirit. (Titus 3:5) and “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.” (Ephesians 2:8)

6.We all, men and women, boys and girls, have direct access to the throne of grace because everyone who is a born-again believer in Jesus Christ is called a “priest and king” in God’s economy. “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” (I Peter 2:9)

I believe that many of the false teachings within the patriocentric movement are in direct contrast to these Scriptures and I would encourage each of us to first examine what we believe about Jesus and His work on the cross, its implications and its marvelous power.

Secondly, I would challenge anyone reading here to examine your own heart and ask yourself whether you have been trusting in good works….baptism, homeschooling, church attendance, modest dress, the list goes on and on, or if you have placed ALL your faith and hope in Jesus’ blood and righteousness alone.

And finally, I would challenge you to examine the teachings within your own church system, whether it is Protestant, Greek Orthodox, Roman Catholic, etc. Ask yourself what your church teaches about ecclesiastical authority and family authority. Does it line up with the Word of God? It is a top down system that requires certain works in exchange for a relationship with Jesus Christ or do you have the assurance that you are saved for eternity by His death on the cross in your stead? Does it teach that the fruits of the spirit and obedience to all the one anothers is what our lives will demonstrate or is there a list of man made rules?

If you desire to talk with me about this, please send me a note to My desire is that no one who visits this website will leave without knowing the glorious truth that we can have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and can enjoy a life filled with His goodness and grace!

Adoration of the Home was painted by regional artist, Grant Wood. The original hangs in the Cedar Rapids Museum of Art. Ben Campbell and Lon Eldridge deserve extra cookies for writing, performing, recording, and mixing Mom’s Prairie Song for the podcast intro and outro. Great job, guys. Garrison Keillor would be proud.

Copyright © 2013 ~ ~ Karen Campbell ~ All Rights Reserved.